Sometimes, believing God and doing what His word says can feel like being a glow stick - something has to bend, shake, snap, or crack in our lives before we are fully illuminated the way He wants us to be for His glory.
Maybe it's our character, our will, or a mindset that's keeping us enslaved. But ever-growing roots and fruit in Christ = painful and uncomfortable moments that go against our natural tendencies and desires to be selfish, self-centered, and comfortable.
Think about this - once you snap or shake a glow stick, it's "activated". The chemical compounds have reacted, and light is produced. Our faith is the same way; how can we deepen our faith in Christ if we've never experienced moments that push us to "activate" our faith and trust in Him?
Psalm 34:19 says, "One who is righteous has many adversities"... don't pass over this part of the verse. We aren't promised rainbows and butterflies, and we will experience unpleasant things in life.
But that's not the end of the verse either, "...but the LORD rescues him from them all."
God is generous with His presence. He is with you, and He will lead you. Keep going. Cry and scream in the process if you have to. But lean in to those moments and hard feelings that are activating your faith. Not through your own will and strength, but through God's strength, power, grace, and wisdom.